I have dealt with depression my entire life essentially.

I went on to get addicted to drugs and become a criminal to support my habit. The smoke has cleared and I am left with a debilitating sense of guilt, doom and remorse.

When I was a child I was paranoid, I dealt with a few things that bother me daily from my earlier years.

I had been assaulted by an adult and repressed it apparently. I started getting weird flashbacks in my 20s and I developed sexual insecurity that went beyond that of what I suffered in my teens.

I also don't trust older men in a creepy sense. Always been that way. I can't say who is based on the flashbacks but my mother gave me an idea of who it probably was and it really bothers me. Especially in the way that I now view my childhood.

I developed severe OCD as well. That is nearly unbearable on its own.

I obsess over memories to the point where they nearly become some sort of modified delusions of a true event. It's odd and deeply damaging to my mind.

I am very lonely.…