Relationships

The Case for Boring Men

I finally met an exciting, romantic guy. It, uh, sucked?

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Where have all the good men gone?

This is a question women have been asking for years, especially those of us who have spent any time on dating apps. We’re tired of the low-effort messages, the uninspired dates, the men whose idea of flirting is asking what we do for work. We’re begging them to distinguish themselves from the pack. To show a little initiative . A little imagination. A little romance. In response, dating apps have introduced new A.I.-powered tools to help users flirt, initiate conversation, and distinguish themselves from the millions of other singles struggling to do the same.

But effort is a slippery thing to measure.…