A good ‘ol deep cleaning—formally known by the Butthole Powers That Be as douching—has long been treated as a prerequisite for anal sex, right up there with anal lube and a little patience. In a society that despises mess, especially messes of the sexual or genital variety, it’s not surprising that people have long considered an unexpected rabbit pellet making a cameo during anal sex to be The Ultimate Bedroom Buzzkill. But, as it turns out, douching is rarely necessary.

“People picture poop just hanging out right inside the anus and expect to encounter a mess every time they have anal sex. But that's not how it works,” Evan Goldstein, DO, a doctor in New York City who specializes in anal care, the founder of Bespoke Surgical , and the author of Butt Seriously , tells Cosmopolitan . “Between bowel movements, stool sits higher up in the colon, mostly in the sigmoid colon, which is just above the rectum, which is above the anal canal,” he explains.…