Does the AO3 outage, which could potentially last weeks , have you frantic about what to read in bed late into the wee hours of the night? Are you concerned that there is nothing in contemporary fiction that can replicate the same kinds of delicious, heartbreaking angst written by overworked college students for whom English is their second language? Let me offer you a suggestion:

The Warhammer 40,000 novels.

I am being deadly serious.

I get your likely skepticism. From an outsider’s perspective, Warhammer looks like an immature 12-year-old boy’s idea of cool. It’s a bunch of super-fast, super-big, super-strong dudes swinging medieval swords in an era in which power armor and faster-than-light travel exists, with hardly a woman or brown person in sight. Guys are running around with names like Mortarion and Ferrus Manus leading legions called Death Guard and Iron Hands.…