How to Do It

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Our advice columnists have heard it all over the years—so we’re diving into the How to Do It archives to share classic letters with our readers. Have a question? Send it to Stoya and Rich here. (It’s anonymous!)

Dear How to Do It,

I am a man who is mostly straight. I want a long-term relationship with a woman. I can only see myself kissing a woman and waking up next to one. I can only see myself spending life with a woman. However, there is a part of me that I mostly have to keep suppressed.

I am very masculine and mostly dominant in bed as a man, but I occasionally enjoy having sex with well-endowed men as a bottom and being very submissive in that situation. It is a need that is occasional, like two to three times a year, but it is a need that I am done trying to get rid of. All of the women in my life have either ignored it or tried to force me to get it counseled out of me.…