While other moms carried their kids' backpacks, I handed mine a wrench. It taught her independence.

Courtesy of the author

I gave my kids independence early, even when it felt uncomfortable.

Becoming a single parent made independence a necessity.

It helped my daughters grow into confident, capable young adults.

It was Christmas morning, and my 9-year-old daughter was thrilled to open up our new backyard fire pit .

She asked me if we could roast marshmallows and make S'mores that same night. "Sure," I responded. "If you can put the firepit together."

I knew she could do it, and I was worn out after staying up late the night before wrapping gifts . Still in her pajamas and always up for a challenge, she opened the box, read the instructions, and got to work.

I gave her a wrench, turned on some Christmas music, and went to take a nap.…