First off I don't know how to live sorry. I'm failing my math and chemistry and it makes me feel sooooo inferior and scared to be seen as a dumbass. There's this friend, Zoey, I'm madly in love and she's got a boyfriend so I can't be in love but I am, this is excruciatingly painful for me, Ive tried with all my power to think on something else but I can't, I really can't.

I've been in love for a month and I've NEVER felt this feeling before. It's unusual and excruciatingly painful, I can't deal with this at all, it feels unfair to them both to love her and be her friend. At the end I find that dying would be so so so so much easier than, I don't even know what else. Sorry