Care and Feeding

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Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here .

Dear Care and Feeding,

I’m the single mom of a 16-year-old son. I feel blessed that we have a very close and open relationship. What advice should I give him about dealing with a female friend whose crush he does not reciprocate? My son says he feels guilty because he really likes this girl as a person, and would date her if only she were more attractive.

How can I assure him this is natural and OK without raising another shallow man who judges women by their looks? I also feel bad about my inner “Nooooo!” reaction when he first told me this girl liked him, which I figure is Darwinian because he’s my only child and that primitive part of me wants “better” for him.…