If you enjoy the column below, please subscribe to my newsletter ! You'll get each new issue in your inbox for free. I love having new email friends. Let's open your letters!

Dear Stephen,

I’m pretty sure I have OCD, because for as long as I remember I’ve always been counting things. It’s not even like I do it consciously; it just sort of happens. Like, I can tell you how often I’ve seen a specific type of car, how often I’ve visited my favorite restaurant, and yes, how often I’ve had sex.

ANYWAYS, my long-term boyfriend randomly asked me how many times we’ve had sex. I automatically answered, and now he’s angry. He says it’s weird I know the number and that I might be a creep. But, I mean, I don’t understand why he asked if he didn’t want to know. I feel like he was purposefully tricking me since he knows about my counting. And now he’s refusing to have sex with me. How do I apologize to him for knowing that number?

—Counting Coitus

Dear Counting Coitus,

An apology is in order, but not from you.…