I wonder how people go to psych ward and just stare there. like i literally can not cope without music, movies, and my bad habits. I am so irritated.

How come y’all want me to stop harming myself when you can’t even understand what im feeling and what’s hurting me?? I feel horrible for being so highly sensitive but man, i can no longer give myself reason to stay. Im fucking staying for my appointment with a psychiatrist and that’s it. I feel empty.

It’s my fault. I get it, everything, every chaotic thing that ever happened to me was probably my fault. But I didn’t even ask for this life?? I’m so tired living a life that i didn’t even ask for.

Sometimes I hope everyone is just cruel and unbothered because that way, I can leave. I can escape. I will finally have “valid” reasons to feel this way. and be who i am now.

I’m so tired. I’m so tired.